The difference between the people who seem to eventually succeed in what they want and the rest who fail or stay stagnant, is how they deal with these roadblocks.
There’s a Cow in the Road
Let’s say your big goal is to get to point A. You are in your car and are happily driving to your destination but suddenly, there is something in the road blocking you. For the sake of this example, let’s assume there is a big cow in the road, just standing there and staring at you, blocking you from getting to your destination.
What is your most likely reaction? Do you become angry, upset and mad at the cow because it is delaying you from getting to your destination? Do you just stand there feeling sorry for yourself and give up trying to get to the destination, because there is this big cow in the way? Or do you try to figure out a way to move the cow or go around it?
Getting angry at the cow and upset about the situation, is obviously not helping you get to point A. What is helping you get to point A is either figure out a way to move the cow or figure out a way to get around the cow. If you just keep your focus to getting to point A, staying calm and centered, solutions will come up and you will realize that there are many options for getting to your destination and it doesn’t matter that there is a cow in the road.
If you decide to carry your anger at the cow not only delaying you from getting to point A, it takes your focus off your destination. What’s more, if you decide that you would like to take revenge on the cow for being in your way, this is even worse for you because that changes your goal, instead of your goal being getting to point A, now you goal is getting revenge on the cow while the cow is just standing there looking at you, chewing grass and couldn’t care less.
Another thing to consider when faced with roadblocks is that all challenges are given to us for a reason. Change you focus on thinking on how the cow might even help you to get to your destination faster, or consider that maybe you have taken the wrong route to your destination and there is a better way to get there so you should reconsider and maybe take another direction.
The underlying message here is to view all events and interactions that stop you from getting to your goal, as neutral events. It doesn’t matter what the roadblock is. It could have been an angry bull in the road. What do you want, you want to get to point A, or you want to mess with the bull? Where is your focus?
The best available option and that which will help you succeed when faced with roadblocks is simple: just keep focusing on the goal and figuring out what their next step is.
The only thing that is important is the next step. Usually people who don’t achieve their goals, end up pointing the finger and blaming others, but the truth is, that they didn’t really focus on their goal and didn’t take the right action. Somewhere along the way, they got upset or distracted by difficulties and roadblocks and chose to give up on their goal.
The point is what is your goal and how do you get there, nothing else matters.